[Humans of Courage] Tu Thanh Thuy, Ha Noi

Born an abandoned child, I grew up with my paternal grandparents in Can Tho. Since a young age, I already saw that I had some mental issues, but only until recently, after complete screenings, do I find officially that I am autistic. It came to me as a revelation of what happened in the past and is happening in the present. 

When I was sexually abused by a neighbor all throughout my middle school years, I was always afraid and had to go out my ways to avoid that person when returning home from school. Neither my family or my neighbors believed me, they said because I was mentally unstable, I lured him into touching me. Later on when I was sexually abused or bullied, people would never side with me. When I was in school, I was always dragged to the back of the school yard and beaten up by others at every recess. The worst time was my junior year, when I was cornered and ended up fighting back against others. And I was expelled! 

Leaving it all behind, I stepped out into the world. Unfortunately, the further I have gone, the more different places I have got to experience, the same history repeats itself: more abuse and assaults, only in different forms… I once again face bullies simply because they don’t understand autism or mental disorders. Sometimes, even teachers do not understand, thinking that I am overthinking and self-tormenting. This is one of the reasons why I am constantly anxious, and always in a defensive state. 

Even though this world that I stepped out into can be rough, but there are also many opportunities. I made an effort to finish high school in Da Nang and after, university. I left for Hanoi because of my love for knowledge. I understand that education is the way forward to speak out for people like me. Besides going to school, my friends and I founded a group that aims to raise awareness on autism, with different activities including improvisation. I self-teach sign language and Braille, participate in community activities to promoting the rights of people with disabilities, gender equality, etc. Four years ago, I even biked across Viet Nam to raise awareness of the LGBT community.

I join a special class and paint course for autistic children at the Research Center for Children’s Rights (RCCR). Painting is a way to express my feelings, regardless when it is bright or dark. As people look at these hues, they are looking into my soul. 

I would like to change society’s perception on autism and do not want other autistic kids have to suffer that I had to. We may seem like a big, stable wall, but without a stable support system, I would collapse immediate. This support system is the kindness and non-judgement attitude of everyone. 

Every day, I still put up a fight against stigma and discrimination, and try to find the money to pay for my education. But I always tell myself every morning I get up, that “Today is a new day!”” – Tu Thanh Thuy, Ha Noi

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